BEING an older sister, Scarlett Emery takes great pride in her three younger brothers – who are triplets.
But things aren’t straightforward as Harvey, Daniel and Gabriel, seven, all have profound cerebral palsy, meaning they are non-verbal, unable to walk and doubly incontinent.
SuppliedChantel, Gabriel, Scarlett, and Harvey behind Rob at the beach[/caption]
SuppliedScarlett on sofa and L-R: Harvey, Daniel and Gabriel[/caption]
At just 10, Scarlett, from Poole, Devon, is already helping her parents care for her siblings and takes pride in knowing what they want and even sensing when one of them has fallen ill.
Their older brother Josh also lends a hand, but is much older than his younger brothers and sister.
“I’ve been going off to sleep and I’ve instinctively felt that Harvey is having a seizure and I’ve gone to check,” she told The Sun.
“I’ve caught Harvey having a seizure multiple times. While mum and dad are busy with the ambulance I’ll sit with my other brothers.”
The little girl is sharing her special bond with her younger brothers to mark National Sibling Day, which is today, and raise awareness of how incredible growing up with disabled siblings can be.
But things are far from easy with government support being cut back. In 2021, just £537million was earmarked to help families across the UK.
The Sun launched our Give It Back campaign to help parents across the country look after their children who require specialists care – often around the clock.
A report published by The Disabled Children’s Partnership last month found that almost half of siblings are taking on more caring responsibilities – like Scarlett.
Helps care for younger siblings
Sadly, the report found that many siblings of disabled children experience high levels of anxiety and isolation and more than half experience deteriorating levels of confidence.
Scarlett’s mum Chantel, 42, who works full time as a Disability Advice Officer for Business Disability Forum, is disabled after being left paraplegic following a car accident.
Dad Rob, 45, a motivational speaker and life coach, is the main carer for the triplets but often has to draft in his daughter to help out.
The responsibility means that Scarlett doesn’t enjoy what some people would view as a typical childhood.
But she doesn’t mind her role in taking care of her siblings and even instructs new carers when they arrive.
She said: “I help a lot with my brothers. When new carers come in, I tell them what the boys need.
SuppliedBirthday celebration: Harvey on Chantel’s lap, Scarlett, Daniel and Gabriel at back, Rob and big brother Josh[/caption]
SuppliedL-R all in red for Valentine’s Day: Gabriel, Daniel, Harvey and Scarlett[/caption]
“I show them where the medicines are kept, where their favourite toys are. I will sit with the boys while dad has a shower.”
Both Rob and Chantel are in awe of their daughter’s dedication to her brothers.
Tragically, they were born with a fourth brother, Bradley, who died just 16 days after they were born prematurely at 26 weeks.
“Scarlett is very protective of her brothers,” Rob said.
“She is resilient, tenacious and knows what she wants. Scarlett looks at the world with a different perspective than other 10-year-olds.
“She is very mature and always wants to help people and take on responsibility. She is a natural leader and takes control of situations.”
Three quarters of parents with a disabled child have to give up employment or careers to care for their offspring as there is little support available, the DCP survey found.
My brothers can’t speak but I can communicate with them, I know what they want
Scarlett
Scarlett is supported with residential visits provided by SIBS, a UK charity for brothers and sisters of disabled children and adults, where she can play with neuro-typical children.
But she doesn’t seem to mind taking on a more adult role at home – and her parents reckon she’s sometimes better with the boys than they are.
“The boys are so well-behaved for her. We call her ‘Gabriel-whisperer’ because she keeps him so calm – much more than we can,” Rob jokes.
“I have a different relationship with each of my brothers and I feel protective,” Scarlett said.
“I like to cuddle up under a blanket with Gabriel. My brothers can’t speak but I can communicate with them, I know what they want.”
The Sun’s Give It Back campaign with the Disabled Children’s Partnership has been asking the Government to reinstate funding since 2019.
In 2021, the funding gap in social care and support rose to £573million from £434million.