DEAR DEIDRE: WHEN my son’s relationship ended, he came to stay with us temporarily – and since then my wife has turned the atmosphere at home toxic.
He is 33 and from a previous relationship and she has never accepted him.
She keeps nagging at him and acts like having him is a life sentence.
She is very hostile towards him, saying her space and privacy are being invaded.
He doesn’t feel comfortable in the house. I am 68 and my wife is 65.
She has deeply hurt my son, who feels unwelcome and unwanted.
It is useless trying to talk to her. It is her way or the highway.
She won’t apologise for her bad behaviour and now I am torn between her and my son.
Is what she is doing fair? Does she have the right to reject my son?
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DEIDRE SAYS: Your wife is wrong to act like this.
She sounds jealous of your relationship with your son, perhaps seeing him as a threat. She is putting you in a very difficult position.
Stay firm and calm but spell it out to her that you are not walking away from your son and he will always be welcome.
She can’t be allowed to dictate whether your son is in your life or not – she is bullying and controlling.
If she can’t and won’t accept your son in your life then things will have to change. My support pack Stepfamily Issues will help.
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